Well, Dani memorized my code and used it to download a game that you can talk to friends within the game. She had it on her own phone and I had no clue. I DON'T RANDOMLY check apps bc I MUST approve them. I do read her text messages here and there to the 2 friends she is allowed to talk to on imsg. I'm not a bad parent in this phone area. Now, other areas, maybe so. So the app was gray because although she used my passcode to download it, she didn't know there was a block on older kids' apps--so she couldn't access it from Jessica's phone she is using now. She doesn't know how to get into the kids' screen time and change those things, yet.
I love that Daniela is few and far between discipline issues that yes, she has a punishment but it doesn't bother me as much because I know she is in a process of learning and choosing to follow God or not.
We attended a local English church this week as we have mission teams coming and going with a local organization. They were taking communion at the end, so as a song played I had both kids come to my row to talk. They sat behind me and I sat with friends I went with. I explained how communion is super important and to NOT take it if you have any sin that is not repented of--
1 Corin 11:
27 Therefore whoever eats this bread or drinks this cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty of the body and [e]blood of the Lord. 28 But let a man examine himself, and so let him eat of the bread and drink of the cup. 29 For he who eats and drinks [f]in an unworthy manner eats and drinks judgment to himself, not discerning the [g]Lord’s body. 30 For this reason many are weak and sick among you, and many [h]sleep.
I quickly discussed that taking the bread and juice in an unworthy manner has caused some to be sick or even die. Repent of whatever you got before you do it, and if you can't right now, just don't take it. As I went to take it, both kids sat down. As I walked to get mine, I got a little choked up that they were taking this so serious. High-fiving Jesus on my way to my cup as I held tears in.
Even before I ever came to Jesus, when I visited Catholic churches, I refused to take communion when people said, "just get in line." I had no idea what it really meant and I was not willing to put that in my body out of our respect for what it meant. Isn't that crazy? I think so, too, but something in me said DO NOT DO THAT flippantly.
I still remember the first time I took communion. I TOTALLY understood it and CRIED like a baby at the beauty of it. I totally understood what I was doing and man, was I thankful for what Jesus Christ did for me on that Cross.
As Daniela headed to get hers, tears were flowing from her eyes after repenting of something. She told me later she didn't want to forgive Jessica for telling on her about the phone. Jessica sat down because she didn't want to ask for prayers in her prayer group that morning. In church, we got in groups to pray. She felt like she should ask for prayers for mine and hers relationship but stayed quiet because she doesn't want people to know she sins. I had gone with another and deserted my kids because I had a vision that morning of praying with the CMA girls and holy moly, we are group praying. Daniela figured out her own life and joined a group with Jessica. I love her lack of dependance on me!
So Sunday night, D couldn't sleep that night. She woke up around 3 am after a bad God dream about demons and drowning. She woke up without air, like she was really drowning. She felt like she should read and God showed her how she had sinned and then hid it like Achan. She has my old Bible and a notecard fell out of it when she picked it up to read. It was notes from Joshua 7, and she felt led to go there. https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Joshua+7&version=NKJV
When she got to the stole and hid part, it hit her heart. She felt his conviction when she used my password, but hid it and went on trying to conceal it happened. When I crawled into bed with her in the morning to talk because Jess asked if I knew she was up last night reading at like 3, tears flowed down her eyes to her ears staring at the ceiling. I'm fasting today, Mom. Why would I hear Him and ignore it!? Why would I choose to hid something like this!? She was so distraught about it. I was mentally jumping up and down at this! Yes! Yes! Stay here, D! I told her that repentance means starting over. God erases this. Devil tells us to feel guilt and live there wanting/needing more punishment. Get up and get working for God again.
She told me this morning, God convicted her to read in the mornings, not to do only night readings. She says morning comes and she doesn't remember what she read and it doesn't stay on her mind for the day, but if she reads in the morning, she thinks about that.
